baby · Breastfeeding · motherhood · Parenting

Tips for New moms on Breastfeeding with Joy!!

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Al hamdulilah we have completed 18 months of breastfeeding successfully and in shaa Allah have plans to breastfeed as long as babyA wishes!! Being a first time mom we would obviously have few doubts if we can or not. But in my case al hamdulilah the moment babyA was in my womb with the help of research and guidances i was mentally prepared to bond myself with the baby. I was confident enough to nurse her whatever happens. Even during the labour as soon as the baby was out,  the nurses started to convince me to get the formula milk in stock. To be frank i haven’t got a thought to get it even once. Al hamdulilah my sister is also breastfeeding her kiddo.  The moment my baby needs me irrespective of place, time etc., I nurse her.Initially I was shy to nurse in public but now we don’t mind. I really don’t know about others but this breastfeeding has helped me a lot during our flight journey. The main thing in this journey is trusting ourselves and being confident and firm that we can do it!!  To the new moms, here are my few tips regarding the breastfeeding
1. Trust yourself
Almighty has created everyone for a purpose and the science of body is made to perform the tasks assigned to each part of the body. So for instance heart pumps the blood, likewise the fingers are to hold an object. Similarly after the birth of the baby breast is to nurse the kid, calm down the crying baby, soothe him/her as a kid. So we will have to trust that we will have sufficient milk for our baby. To trust ourselves we will have to brush our basic education and understand the benefits of breastmilk and how the process works.
2. Supportive spouse
When nursing the baby the mind of the mom should be free from worries. This csn happen only when support arises from family members. Research says when there is support from the husband the wife enjoys the previlige of breastfeeding. Even if problem arises from the inlaws if husband helps in putting your foot down she will win the sky too. A supportive husband is a person who helps in daily activities and gets necessary items for the mom and the child.
3. Wear the dress which suits you
This is actually important. Practically a loose outfit will help us to pull up and nurse. It will help you to be confident enough to nurse no matter what who is nearby and where Re you. Try different options and fix which fits you no matter who taunts you. In the end of the day, your baby and you should be convenient and comfortable.
4. Make yourselves comfortable 
Earlier when you have a newborn you would need a nursing pillow and it really helped in balancing the baby and to keep the baby in the 45 degree angle. Later find a comfort zone might be a favourite chair or sofa. I had an arm chair which helped me a lot to balance between the nursing pillow a d my body. You can even lie down and nurse the baby. There are many methods. FIND a suitable position and stay comfortable.
5. Seek guidance
When you are carrying your baby get educated regarding breastfeeding and if at all you feel you don’t get milk try to seek help. There are many facebook groups which are supporting breastfeeding. You can either contact a lactation counsellor or a lactation consultant to help you so that you can enjoy the breastfeeding relationships without any discomfort.
These are the tips which I personally experienced and it clicked for us. Now i would request you to share your experiences on breastfeeding.

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Breastfeeding · motherhood · Parenting

BFF-BREASTFEEDING FELLAS; BREASTFEEDING FRIENDS FOREVER

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We are going to complete our 18 months in a day and l am getting to hear from people around, She is No more a baby! Stop nursing her! If not now then never will she forget. To all the people who say this I just smile back and walk off from the place as I feel, nursing is my duty and almighty has mentioned in the holy Quran to nurse till 2 years comfortably and then wean naturally. Al hamdulilah I am able to nurse my daughter till date. Nursing her I get arrested at times but I feel it’s a good bonding we get to share with joy. The sweet cuddles, the naughty moments and the curvy wavy acrobats she performs since day 1 of her birth can never be tagged even with a million dollars. Who will wish to miss such priceless asset that easily? Isn’t it good to feel that she enjoys the benefits from me as long as she wants to? So when I said I’ll nurse till she self-weans people started to laugh! Did I say wrong? I spoke and convinced her to allow me to baby-wear her. When I say this people mock at me! I don’t care and l have asked her permission till date whether its babywearing or cloth diapering or the undies now. Only since she showed discomfort with the jacket mode ON in a carseat, I was given an opportunity to do my research to learn how to keep her warm. Even now she prefers to be on Undies at home and we are nowhere near potty training. When she can decide on this she can surely decide for herself when to stop nursing too. Through this post I am giving reply to the entire mob out there who keeps on asking why do l still nurse?

Little boy (2-3) with bare chest, arms up, portrait

Picture courtesy

  • It stops tantrums
  • It makes their bad moment to a good one
  • It prevents and shortens the illness
  • A bond between mom and baby grows
  • It improves their immunity
  • It improves their quality of life
  • It lowers cancer risk
  • Peaceful sleep of the baby

This post is not to hurt anyone; it’s for those who tend to hurt me.

When a doctor said its time to stop nursing as extended breastfeeding doesn’t pass any energy to the kid I decided to change the doctor. When you get to hear this, it’s best to change the doctor. At whatever age you are nursing your kid, the kid knows to extract the energy from you and it’s the duty of a mom to eat healthy to gain and pass off the energy and make it a vicious cycle. Being in a research environment all my life; the instinct has made me to research and go with the flow.  Al hamdulilah thanks to my mom for this.  Glad that Faru supports me in all my baby decisions. It’s a real gift. During my initial struggles of breastfeeding my sisy helped me and gave me the confidence to get me to this level where I am right now. To the new moms out there, we have a post on the blog to get prepared on Breastfeeding. Please do have a look on it.

Since I have got to hear of negative stuffs on extended breastfeeding, I asked my mommy blogger friends about their views on Extended Breastfeeding. So here is a gist of what they said. Glad I am around the people who have supported my decision always! It’s good to get the positive energy always!!

Rayeesa Rayeesa

I am a mother of 19 months old boy and Alhumdulilah still breastfeesing. For me, the no.1 factor is that Allah has ordered us in Quran to breastfeed for 2 years. It is his right. The second reason being it is great for immunity and brain development.

Ayesha Yakoob Al-Yousuf 

Alhamdulillah, I have nursed all my kids till the age of 2 years because its recommended in the Qura’n “hawlain kamilain’ – two complete lunar years. I didn’t want to wean them off before it was time as it was still their right.I began to wean them ever so gradually only when the time was near. For me what motivated me was the incomparable convenience of breastfeeding. Yes, its convenience. You wont’ be bothered with washing so many bottles, you can instantly comfort them when they are hurt, it’s much easier at bedtime and through the night (although this has to be controlled towards the end) and all this comes with the innumerable benefits of breastfeeding to both mother and child including nutritional, psychological and emotional.

Zayeneesha Ayeina

Both of us sisters breastfed our kids till 2 years of age as Allah prescribed in the Qur’an (And we even nursed each other’s kids lol hence making us foster mums to them 💞) – although difficult in the start, it has been a breeze afterwards Alhamdulillah and the benefits of it all couldn’t have made us decide otherwise 💜

Madelon Basher 

 I breastfed my son until 3.5 years. After completing his Islamic birthright we continued until his need was fulfilled. Breastfeeding is so much more then just nursing. Here in Holland there are many misconceptions about breastfeeding in our ummah. One of the reasons I started writing about breastfeeding on my blog.
I am also part of the board of the (Dutch) Islamic Breastfeeding Organisation Halimah. We are there for sisters who want to fulfill the birthright of their children by giving them all the physical, mental and spiritual islamic guidence, support and knowledge they need. Breastfeeding your child is a blessing given to us and it is so wonderful seeing sisters helping and supporting eachother, spreading proper knowledge about breastfeeding all for the same goal. Completing a part of our deen. Breastfeeding is hard work and every sister deserves true support when needed. The breastfeeding period only happens once in a child’s life and it is such a special way Allah subhana wa ta’aala gave us to bond with our children. I am still amazed every time new scientific research shows new benefits of breastfeeding. Even for toddlers and preschoolers the health benefits continue what was one of my reasons to proceed after the 2 years.

Diah Dwi Arti 

I breastfed my first son for only 8 months because I got pregnant with my second son. I had a bad morning sickness at the time so I couldn’t eat well. I decided to stop breastfeed him and it broke my heart. I promised to continue the breastfeed if he asked when his brother was born but he never asked for that. I then breastfed my second son for more than 2 years, about one or two months. Now I have my third son and I’m willing to breastfeed him until he’s 2 years. Why breastfeed them? Because it’s cheaper than giving formula for them. Cheap, healthy, practical. And breastfeeding is a great process to make a bonding between mom and baby. The second reason is breastfeeding is a natural way to birth control. I myself got my menstrual periode 4 months after giving birth. But ofcourse there are many challenges in breastfeeding from the lack quantity to the quality of breast milk. Weaning is also a challenge. I wean my first and second son without any difficulties alhamdulillaah. And I hope so with this third baby. I wrote something about breastfeeding in my blog as well so you are free to check my page.

Weronika Ozpolat

 I breastfed all 4 of my children and currently still breastfeeding the youngest. Although I experienced a lot of negativity for carrying on so long, I managed to continue until near the 2 year mark. Despite negativity, I found breastfeeding easy and the best way to give my babies the nutrition they needed. I think having a supportive husband really helped. There are so many health benefits, even for toddlers. It is also a great way to comfort them. It was a special bonding experience and I am proud I was able to do it.

BFF-BreastFeedingFellas

These lovely mumma bloggers said I am a rockstar and I can nurse my baby until we can!! In shaa allah will nurse until she weans off naturally with almighty’s grace. As I have got support from my friends you will also get support from us all!! Say a hello to your breastfeeding friend from our gang of mommy bloggers!!

baby · Breastfeeding · faith · Food · Love · motherhood · Parenting · Playtime · Pregnancy

Help- I doubt if my baby is happy with Breastmilk!!

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Many ladies assume they do have a low supply and switch to formula or cow’s milk without having an actual proof. When asked they say we don’t know why there is a low supply!

Many have a huge list why do they believe they  have a low supply and now we are going to answer them that their supply isn’t low with few facts

 

1.My baby is always hungry and cries

Babies breastfeed not only to fulfil their tiny stomach but also to get a bond with her/his mom; a sort of relaxation; warmth. Usually elders tend to forget what they did during their new mommy days and say her daughter or daughter-in-law that there is no milk supply and force them to believe their milk supply is less and move towards formula feed.

 

  1. I used to leak and now I don’t

A mom who thinks/says like this is a person who doesn’t know about the anatomy and science of breastfeeding. It’s one of the miracles of almighty. It’s everything with the demand and supply. Once the body knows how much the baby needs it will regulate based on the needs of the baby. Being a mommy of 16 month old I haven’t leaked even a single time and it doesn’t mean my baby is underweight. Al hamdulilah and thanks to almighty for a healthy living.

 

  1. My baby doesn’t wait till I try to offer

Usually parents associate crying to hunger. It’s not of that sort. There are many cues which babies give for what they are crying. They may cry for many reasons like having gas, being colic, sleepy, tired, there might be a growth spurt and so on!! So please do follow the cues and know the reason why they cry and attend based on that.

baby-cues

Credits: Thanks to

  1. My baby stays awake all night

Night waking doesn’t only mean to hunger it might also be due to the growth spurt, teething, fever, rashes, cold or reverse cycling where the babies get confused between day and night and do the process opposite.

 

  1. My breasts feel softer than earlier

Once the flow is regulated based on the baby’s need there will be a change in the size of the breast and it doesn’t have any relation to the milk supply.

 

These are few reasons to know that your milk supply isn’t really low. To know if your milk supply is low check for two stuffs which are important

 

  1. Baby’s Weight

Only best measure is to check the weight of the baby.

 

  1. Diaper output

We can figure out with the output based on how much the input is. A normal baby’s output will be 3 poops approximately and 5 to 6 wet diapers. And if the baby is active apart from the nap hours then your supply is perfect

 

  1. Do check if there is a good latch and hear the swallowing/gulp sound.

 

  1. Follow your instinct

 

If you really feel your supply is low please do visit the lactation consultant for further help

baby · Baby Led Weaning · Babywearing · Breastfeeding · Cloth Diapering · Environment · Milestone · Parenting · Pregnancy

20th Century Vs 21st Century Moms

These are my views on the topic “20th Century Vs 21st Century Moms” and I am writing this as a part of the Blogging Marathon – http://supermommitali.com/category/bloggers-marathon
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A mom is a mom whether you are from the 20th Century or the 21st Century! As a mother we seem to be over responsible in raising a healthy, happy and well-adjusted kid. This is definitely overwhelming for a parent for sure. Being a 21st Century mom I really have too much of Information filled in my social networking but I really miss out on the informal support which my parents had in the 20th Century. It’s not because I don’t trust them it is just because I think a lot, analyse and want to give the best to my kid.

                The technology has a huge impact on mommy’s behaviour and their lifestyle. One of the live examples is blogging and social networking. Before the boon of the Internet the networking was live and direct only with the neighbours, family and the first hand information was got only from the family but now its all over the internet. The 21st Century is completely evolving around the “OUT-Come” based whereas the 20th Century was “Time-based”. Everything is   Research-driven and we are open to learn anything from anyone. Everything starting from the conception till the end is digitalised I can say. A baby born in the 21st Century is digitalised.

                With the technology we have today, mothers literally do a lot for their babies, they go insane thinking too much and still they feel they are missing out something and fall into the guilt trap. There is an expectation set “My intuition is Right and I know and I will go by this parenting theory”.

Let’s have a look at how things worked on the 20th Century and 21st Century according to my perspective on various aspects.

Maternity Fitness:

                Earlier in the 20th Century the maternity fitness wasn’t that noticed. Since India is a land of joint family and bonding the pregnant ladies would do lot of household work and would be fit and perfect but many of the mommies wouldn’t be aware of taking care of themselves. Those 9 months would go either by doing household chores and thereby gaining the needed strength to deliver the babies normally or at times remain idle and gain lot of fat leading to difficulties.

                Now in the 21st Century, Once they know they are pregnant they willingly join maternity classes where the doctors and doulas themselves teach yoga and few fitness regime. New aged mommies are fully aware and educated about pregnancy and maternity phases and are better groomed with the necessary information. With the abundant  resources online many spread the word about workouts/ fitness stuffs to take care of themselves as well their babies with care and concern.

Maternity Fashion:

                Earlier the pregnancy fashion was considered to be conservative. The dress style was to conceal their bump. They would either wear saree to be in their comfort zone or wear a salwar khameez and hide their bump with the dupatta/shawl. Even at all they wear a jean they would wear a tunic top which would conceal the bump. Main goal is to conceal themselves in a billowy clothes.

                Now in the 21st Century the main goal is to accentuate and feature their baby bump, look stylish and give all detailing of the bump they have. Even the top designers have come up with stuffs where the moms-to-be can wear and enjoy the 9 months as a fashion diva in these special months.

Parenting Resources:

                Earlier they would be in the form of books and not every mom-to-be would like to engage themselves in reading books. If I were a mom of the 20th Century, I wouldn’t engage myself in reading books as I become tired of holding a book continuously. For the Resources either one has to own a copy of the book or go to a library to gain the resources. To access regarding the birth stories we had to depend on the elders of the home, neighbours who would have by then forgotten the crisp and minute details of their experience.

                Now we have everything on the internet, right from the birth stories, to the after care of delivering. Many bloggers write about their birth story and what all they do to induce natural labour which is scientifically proven.

Ultrasonogram / Scans:

With the advancement of technology we are in a position to find out the gender of babies and are even able to get highly defined 5D images of the babies in the womb. It definitely serves as an anti-anxiety therapy to the overwhelmed to- be-moms who could quench their thirsts about all the unanswered questions they go through because of  those stressful hormone surges. A Mom-to-be definitely do feel happy when her baby kicks, move around inside the womb but it takes her to a whole new excitatory stage when she can literally listen to the first heart beat and when she looks her baby moving legs/hands the joy is unimaginable. With the recent advancements if at all there is an issue in the baby’s growth or health doctors help to treat the babies intrauterine itself or can also plan an immediate surgery or needed interventions the next moment the baby jumps out onto our hands without much wasting the golden hours. Thanks to the Almighty and the technology for giving this happiness.

Precious Moments After giving birth:

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                Earlier there was a condition only during normal delivery the mom was allowed to cuddle the baby as soon as the baby is born. Enjoy the baby crawl moments, golden hour, etc., even without knowing about it. This all happened only if the doctor had best knowledge about it and only if his school had taught about it.

                With the technology in hand a mom-to-be knows about the importance of baby-crawling, the relation between baby-crawling and latching, delayed cord clamping, golden hour, saying a big NO to formula feed unless the situation mandates the need, giving a birth plan to a doctor, latching, even at all there is a tongue tie, if at all there is a latching issue seek an advice of the medical practitioner, enjoy the same benefits with the C-Sec. Gentle C-Sec by getting partial anaesthesia where she can sense the baby coming out of her. With the resources in her hand she is able make herself ready to the environment.

Breastfeeding

                With pexels-photo-235243the exploitation of formula milk and its undue marketing strategies in the late 20th Century parents were forced to give formula thinking their milk supply was not sufficient. It would either be completely on formula feed or would be on a top feed. When the baby reached 3 months external solids like cerelac, oats porridges, juices were given to babies not thinking on the maturity of the guts. But now in this century moms know the importance of breastmilk, when to start solids, when to introduce water, why not to start solids before 6 months, etc. In the olden era mothers used to breastfeed atleast for 3 years and in the scriptures at least in Quran its written that its mandatory for a mom to breastfeed the baby till 2 years and it also has given benefits of breastfeeding which is now being researched by the scientists. ONLY because of breastfeeding antibodies are formed naturally and babies are able to fight. This concept is understood by all. Normalising of breastfeeding is understood and people are supporting to nurse their babies in public when situation arises in their comfort zone. Earlier in the 20th Centuries moms used to run to the restrooms to nurse their babies but now NONE runs to the restrooms as they know Feeding is not a shame. Nursing in Public doesn’t mean we show the skin, it can also be done by being modest and being in the comfortable zone. We have techniques such as 2Tee-method, by using a cover, etc.

Babywearing

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Use of infant carriers wasn’t welcomed by many in the 20th Century though the concept evolved in Asia and it was associated to poverty or transience attached for choice/necessity to attach the babies to their bodies. They felt how safe is the baby going to be in a cloth compared to the hand? But now in this century mommies feel comfy carrying their babies in a sling, wrap, meh-dai, soft structured carriers, what not? With the babywearing concept they nurse the baby in it, rock to sleep, smile, cuddle, relax, eat, sleep without fear of dropping the kid down. During the teething phase, sleep regression colic phase, babywearing is a boon!! With the babywearing a new mom can now enjoy almost all the exciting entertainments and outings. Even hiking is possible too.

Diapering

                Once the baby was born, cloth nappies were used those days on the bums but then due to the widespread marketing of the disposable diapers, it became a boon to the over-exhausted mommies who had to keep washing the soiled nappies several times a day to reuse them. But it was not only less safer than the cloth nappies to the gentle baby bums but also a curse to the environment. Mommies in the early 20th century used to make cloth nappies where it would hold a pee and poop but doesn’t damage their clothing. After the disposable diaper entered the scene  the usage of homemade cloth diapers moved out of our homes slowly. In the 21st century there are moms who use disposables 24/7 . There are night time diapers, daytime diapers with absorbent technology, criss-cross technology and a unique design for a gender and a different concept for gender. Gender inequality doesn’t play over here. The design is based on the anatomy of the sex. With the care and concern shown towards the environment as well as towards the babies modern cloth diapers are slowly drifting into the market and gaining positive popularity. Potty training is also done with proper research and at the right age.

Raising Healthy Kids:

                Making the kids eat is a tedious task when we force feed them. Concept of force feeding was practised and is still practised by the 20th Century moms. The main concept then was a chubby baby believed  to be a healthy baby. But now with the resources the 21st Century is able to analyse and find out that being chubby is not the essential factor for being healthy. Being active, sleeping properly, self-feeding and nursed when the kid demands it is healthy now. There is a concept of baby-led weaning where the baby decides when to eat and what to eat. By this method, kids eat a good variety of food compared to the force-fed babies and special care taken babies. My sister who is a doctor by profession used to say, when I was a mom-to-be  that when the baby nears his/her 1st birthday the baby must be able eat his/her cultural food themselves. Even now only those who follow the research oriented concept believe in it rest follow the same old school of thoughts.

                Celebrating the First Birthday party is a business in this era they spend lavishly these days by planning theme parties. Earlier it was inviting close friends family members and the party was done within home but now with the advancement in the lifestyle and technology they seek help from event planners and make it like a marriage. But few do DIY stuff for their babies joy.

                Earlier or now whichever century it is, people followed one Rule, Make the child happy!! They followed moreover or less the same concept but practised without knowing the name of it. Now with the researches happening everyday, this century moms have a whole bunch of resourced information with them where they are able to know the name of the process and make it happen with full heart and clear mind.

                I am happy that I am a 21st Century mom where I had an opportunity to research on these facts and keep myself updated and give my best in parenting. As I am a mommy of 1 year Old I am stopping with these concepts in which I have personal experience and confidence. Happy motherhood to all the new moms out there and I thank all the old aged moms without whom the now healthy and self educated Moms/moms-to-be society wouldn’t have been into existence !!